Raising Emotionally Smart Kids: What Every Parent Can Practice This Summer

By Victoria Cortez, Author & Curator of Childhood Wisdom

Summer’s here—and while school may be out, real learning is just getting started.

But I’m not talking about flashcards or math workbooks.I’m talking about something deeper and far more impactful:emotional intelligence.

In a world that’s fast, unpredictable, and full of big feelings, raising emotionally smart kids is one of the most important things we can do as parents.

And guess what?

Summer is the perfect time to start.

Giving kids the language to describe feelings builds self-awareness.

🌱 What Is Emotional Intelligence, Anyway?

Emotional intelligence (or EQ) is a child’s ability to:

• Recognize their own feelings

• Express those feelings in healthy ways

• Understand others’ emotions

• Navigate relationships with empathy and confidence

It’s the stuff that helps our kids bounce back after a meltdown, apologize without shame, and speak up with kindness.

And unlike test scores, EQ is teachable—and it starts at home.

☀️ 5 Summer Practices to Build EQ (Without the Lectures)

A visual feelings chart makes emotions easier to talk about—especially for younger kids.

1. Name the Feeling

“I see you’re feeling frustrated—want to talk about it?”

Kids need words for what they feel.Model this by naming your own emotions and helping them name theirs.

🛠 Try This: Create a “Feelings Chart” on the fridge with faces + words like happy, tired, embarrassed, nervous.

Every meltdown is a moment to teach—not just to fix.

2. Use Everyday Moments as Teaching Tools

Spilled juice? Sibling fights? These are golden opportunities.

Instead of jumping to correction, ask:

“What were you feeling when that happened?” or “What could we do differently next time?”

3. Model Regulation

When you regulate, they learn to regulate too.

Let them see you pause and take a deep breath when you're stressed.Let them hear you say, “I’m feeling overwhelmed—I’m going to take a break and come back.”

🛠 Try This: Use a mindfulness bell app during screen time or quiet moments to pause and breathe.

4. Practice Apologies & Repair

Saying ‘I’m sorry’ with love and clarity teaches kids how to own mistakes with grace.

Teach them it’s okay to get it wrong—and what matters is how we make it right.

“I’m sorry I snapped. I was feeling frustrated, but I still want to speak kindly to you.”

This models healthy accountability—not perfection.

Praise progress, not perfection—especially when it’s emotional growth.

5. Celebrate Effort, Not Just Results

“You worked hard to calm down!”“You tried something new even though you were nervous!”

When you praise emotional growth, kids learn that how they respond matters as much as what they achieve.

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🌻 Why Summer Is the Best Time to Start

No school stress. More downtime. Space to slow down and talk things out.

This is when emotional intelligence can flourish through real-life moments—not lectures.

Summer gives us space to slow down, reflect, and grow—together.

So if your goal this summer is to raise a child who’s confident, compassionate, and calm under pressure?

Start by making feelings a family language.

📥 Want to go deeper?

Download the free printable: “The Emotionally Smart Summer Checklist” or enroll in our Mindful Parenting Course for more step-by-step guidance.

You’ve got this. And I’m cheering you on every deep breath of the way.

—Victoria